Names & Knowing, Caring & Loving

As caregivers continue in the journey with their loved one’s dementia, at one time or another they will find themselves faced with a variant of the question: Does she/he remember who you are? Taylor (2008) directly addressed this question and other concerns of caregivers and loved ones. As a carer for her mother with advanced dementia, she knew first-hand the changing landscape of her mom’s memory. In her article, she took apart the question by examining the motivations behind it, which she combatted with the assertion that she knows who her mother is and she knows she loves her. She also pointed out that asking her mother if she recognizes her does neither of them any good – however, her caring does. Taylor further explored the significance of names and separated the caring and loving from names and knowing. Later, she discussed the consequences of using certain words to frame dementia and define the journey.

Take some time to read through this impactful article: On recognition, caring, and dementia.